The Art of Interaction.

The way that people interact with each other has always fascinated me. Whether it’s between two strangers engaging in small talk or a couple of old friends, people reveal a lot more than they think by the way that they partake in social situations. For instance, I recently stopped into a McDonalds to get a quick coffee and I happened to see a man who seemed to have set up shop at one of the tables equip with a laptop, briefcase, file folders, etc. We made seemingly awkward eye contact as I entered and walked up to the counter but thought nothing of it, but after I’d made my purchase I walked by him to wait for one of my friends. As I did this he said excuse me and asked me if I liked poetry. Now, at this point I was thinking in my head that this was a creepy middle-aged man who just wanted to talk to me (because this has happened far more times than I’d like), but I paused for a second to hear what he had to say. Saw my skepticism and explained that he was doing some work there to get out of the house and that when he needed a break from working that he would write little poems, and he asked if I’d spare a moment to give my opinion on one. Looking around the McDonalds and seeing my friend had not returned, I told him I had time for just one or two short ones but still did not get too close. The poems were simple and nice, though rather common place, and after I’d read two my friend returned. The man then shook my hand and thanked me for the comments and I wished him a good night.

It is interesting that this man seemed so comfortable with asking any old person to spare a minute or two with him just to have a bit of company. Had it been me working at a public place I most likely would have just gone about my business and kept to myself. On the opposite end of the spectrum, one of my closest friends would be the polar opposite. Every time we are out together he will make conversation with just about anybody like they were old friends. I really admire this sense of social comfort and confidence in this way. His happy and easygoing personality draws people to him, and I always enjoy being able to witness it.

I have also noticed that people tend to act dramatically differently when they are with people that they consider friends in contrast to acquaintances. For example, despite my tendency to seem shy in front of people that are new or that I am uncomfortable with, when I am with my close friends, like the one that I just spoke about, I am very gregarious. And when this friend comes out of situations where we are in public surrounded by a good number of people he becomes slightly more quiet and perhaps even a bit reserved. I know that my change in personality is a result of my level of comfort with him and I feel like I can let my guard down and be myself. Though I obviously can’t be certain, I think that the same reasoning is behind his personality change as well. From my viewpoint it gives me the impression that when he is with me that he feels like the need to act so completely extroverted is gone and that he can relax a bit.

The art of interaction has been evaluated for years and I’m sure that it will be for years to come. Though I’m not sure how much progress there really is to make in such a matter because it will forever be impossible for one person to get inside the head of another to understand the thought processes behind what motivates their behavior. None the less, it is still fascinating to think about.